I’ve been told by many people that I do some strange or weird things, which is ridiculous because I don’t do THAT many weird things. Any who, one of these people happen to be my mother. The latest “weird thing” she believes I’ve started to do is put my hands in my rear pockets. I started doing this about three weeks ago.
Every time I do it Mom says, “You’re weird.” Or, “Jorge you’re SO retarded.” She likes to change it up. You know, saying the same thing all the time can get boring.
So, today I said, “I’m bringing back pockets back in style!” I put my hands in my back pockets and asked Mom why she thought they (back pockets) were invented.
She said, “So people could put things in them.”
“That’s ridiculous!” I responded. Then people would sit on the stuff in their pockets.” She had to agree with me. Who wouldn’t – this is common sense. Anyway, putting your hands in your rear pockets is fun. And for another thing, it’s a conversion starter. “How?” you ask. What a GREAT question.
It works like this: you put both your hands in your rear pockets and make waving motions, like you were saying hi to someone except at butt level, and behind you, using very small circles (you can’t move your hands too much when they’re in your pockets). People around you will be like, “Oh wow! That guy (or girl) farted!”
This is your cue to turn around and say, “No I didn’t!”
When people want to know, “So why you were waving your hands?” you tell them, “I just read this guy’s blog post and decided it’d be cool to help bring back pockets in style for something useful, just like he’s been trying to do for the past three weeks.” (See how this also turns into a way you can help me promote my blog?) The conversation has been started. To keep it going you keep talking to these people. If you want to talk to them, that is – you don’t have to. Just don’t say I didn’t say you can talk to them.
People don’t seem to know any more what back pockets were really made for, so please help me spread the word. Thank you for reading along, and I hope that you use your back pockets in good health. Always.